Expectations when not fulfilled: Try Some New Things

What is an expectation? How we defined it. Is it a feeling or a desire? Lots of questions run in our minds when we think about expectations. The expectation is a feeling, in which we want others to do something in our favor or for our-self. Like we expect our mother to prepare our meals, our father brings chocolates for us, or our husband or boyfriend bring gift or cake on our birthday. All these are our expectations from our loved ones.

Also check out – How to deal anger and reduce stress

Is it good to expect anything from others:

There is nothing like good or bad in expecting something from our near and dear ones. It is a natural feeling or phenomenon. No one can judge this feeling by saying it is correct or not. We only expect from people whom we are closed, who can do something for making us happy. It is good to expect but it’s not good to react when things are not going as you think. Because no one knows what you are thinking or expecting from them.

What happens when expectations are not fulfilled.

Expectations are one side feeling, other person doesn’t know what you are expecting from them. Sometimes consequences are weird and rare. Consequences vary from person to person as per their temper. It usually happens people expect something special on their special day. But when things are not going as per their expectations they ruined the whole day.

Why do expectations decay many relationships?

Expectations lead us to failure and pain. When we expect something that our partner doesn’t fulfill, we feel low. We’ve set them up to disappoint us and set ourselves up to be hurt. Expectations don’t allow for the variance of life.

Also check out – In a relationship, the biggest mistake we make

How to deal with unfulfilled expectations?

It’s difficult to let go of the emotions and feelings of an unfulfilled expectation. Yes, you have to process emotion and think about it to deal with it, and that is instrumental in moving on. But the whole point is that you need to move on.

When you don’t release that pain, you’re holding onto that feeling of disappointment. It can cause you to get stuck and even lead you to feel like there’s no way to overcome it. You replay the scene of the incident again and again, as though hoping something different will happen each time you imagine it. You obsess over what could have been.

FORGET & FORGIVE

When other people let you down and cause your unfulfilled expectations, it can be hard to move on. But it’s good to forget everything as soon as possible. Forgiveness is the best remedy that helps in overcoming your disappointment, and it can also have positive effects on mental health. 

GET BACK INTO THE ROUTINE

It’s good to get back on track. You need to rid of the negativity and return to your normal life. Try new things, implement new hobbies. Here are some things to try when you feel disappointed.

  • Set new goals
  • Advancing towards your goals
  • Applying for new jobs
  • Creating new art

Unfulfilled expectations can be very heartbreaking and painful, and dealing with them is not easy. The disappointment and guilt can be overwhelming, and it can even cause you to fear to get up and try again.

But you can’t let your setbacks and bad times rule you. Instead, learn to deal with fallout and emotions that come with these unfortunate circumstances through positive thinking and self-awareness.

Also check out – Happiness in Little Things

How to Stop Expecting Too Much From Others

  • It is not easy to allow yourself not to expect from others. It is a natural feeling that comes because of the love and attachment one has with the other. The only thing you can do is not to prioritize dates and events. Because it is observed mostly people expect something good and special to happen on their special days like a birthday.
  • Secondly you need to understand the attitude and behavior of another person. Whether they think the same way you think. If they are not alike you thinking, it’s good not to expect anything.
  • Stop comparing yourself to other people and other’s life. Everyone has their unique strengths, abilities, and journey in life. Stop basing your worth in comparison to other people. Instead, embrace your individuality and be true to yourself.
  • Question your expectations. Ask yourself whether your expectations are genuine. 

Bottom Line

Expecting life to always turn out the way you want is guaranteed to lead to disappointment because life will not always turn out the way you want it to. And when those unfulfilled expectations involve the failure of other people to behave the way you expect them to, the disappointment also involves resentment.

“I find my life is a lot easier the lower I keep my expectations.”

― Bill Watterson

“You can’t expect everyone to have the same dedication as you.”

― Jeff Kinney, Diary of a Wimpy Kid